5 Reasons To Kick Fears Ass
“I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.”
― Frank Herbert, Dune
Fear is wonderful and terrible all at the same time. Fear compels us to take risks, but it also traps us. Fear adds exhilaration and excitement to life, but it can also add anxiety and paralysis.
At it’s best fear asks us to face ourselves. At it’s worst it keeps us from being who we truly are.
The Evil Boss
I once caught my boss stealing from bands at a job I had. I was scared to death to stand up to her. But eventually I faced my fear and confronted her.
She made arguments. She made excuses. And she cried. Fake cried.
And despite her assurances, I still lost my job. For some time I thought confronting her was a mistake.
But over time, I realized that the incident had taught me a lot. I learned that something mattered to me more than having a cool job. I learned that I had integrity. And I learned I had the guts to stand up to a person in power.
Before all of this happened I had spent years avoiding myself and avoiding my fears. I did it through drugs, through relationships, through TV, and through endless distraction.
I avoided looking for my true self, because I was afraid that my true self was a loser, a jerk, a failure, and a fool.
But when I finally faced this big fear by confronting my boss, everything changed. I realized there was something good inside of me. Because the loser, or the jerk I feared I was, would have kept his mouth shut.
When I spoke up, I realized that I could have faith in myself. That I could trust myself. And from that trust, I was able to make real change. I was able to begin embodying who I truly was.
Facing Fear and Being You.
Here are some of the reasons and practice I use to face my fears.
1. Who I Want To Be
I face my fears because that is who I want to be. I don’t want to be someone who avoids their fear and who lives on the run.
When we give into fear, when we close our eyes, and just ignore what scares us. It hurts. There is some part of us that sighs and feels cheated. And we feel like we can’t trust ourselves.
So I remind myself daily that I am a person who faces fear. And just by doing this, I become that kind of person.
2. The World I Want to Live In
I don’t want to live in a world of fear. So I try to change it, by facing my fear. I face them imperfectly, slowly, and sometimes painfully.
At one point people lived in a world with slaves, but other people weren’t willing to accept that. And they changed it. Slowly and painfully. But they changed it.
But even though it’s hard I remind myself, I’m not facing this fear for me. But to make the world a better place.
3.Trust in the Truth
I’ve found that most of what I fear is the truth.
I’m afraid to admit that I’m going to die someday. I’m afraid to admit that I’m not exceptional. I’m afraid to admit I could be more compassionate and wise.
But time has taught me to trust the truth. Because truth is where transformation is found. When I face the truth, I change my life. When I avoid the truth, I stay the same.
Whenever I meet a fear I don’t want to face, I ask myself, “What do I want to trust? Do I want to trust my fear or the truth on the other side? And when the answer is clear, I find the only choice is to face my fear.
4. Following My Heart
I love my brain. It’s great at doing taxes and making grocery lists. But when it comes to doing what’s right, it’s like a dream catcher full of fear.
My heart on the other hand knows what’s up. Whenever I follow my heart, my life goes better. And best of all my heart is willing to face fear.
My heart is used to fear. It’s faced it with every new friend, girlfriend, or dream. So whenever fear ties my brain in knots. I close my eyes and follow my heart.
5. Facing Myself
Whenever I face my fear, I face myself. And facing myself is the hardest and most rewarding thing I’ve ever done.
Whenever I’ve been afraid to talk to a cute girl, apply for a job, or even go skydiving. I’ve had to face a part of myself that is uncertain, shy, and unclear. And each time I face it I become stronger.
So whenever I find a fear that seems impossible. I remember how important it is to face myself and do my best to put on a smile and meet myself again.