You may think your life was handled until the past week. You may now be discovering that there are places in your life that are out of integrity, that can’t manage some pressure or change. Nothing to beat yourself up about, but an incredible opportunity to learn.

I THOUGHT MY BUSINESS WAS SUCCESSFUL. I was making six figures as a coach, I had plenty of money, I mostly bought what I wanted.

Then I went into business with someone else, we started a second project, we hired an expensive team, and all of a sudden I noticed that our money came in spurts, I rarely had as much cash on hand as I thought, and I couldn’t get more clients quickly even if I wanted them.

I THOUGHT I LOVED WORK AND HAD MY WORK-LIFE BALANCE DOWN, I took a whole month off for vacation. I took one day off a week. I got to work from home.

Then I added a lot of complexity to what I was doing, I was in a serious relationship that really required my attention. I upped my level of ambition; I even tried to do more when other people could do stuff for me. Pretty soon I noticed I didn’t know how to turn my brain off, I was working super late, I was stressed out and losing my mind.

I THOUGHT I HAD TRANSITIONED OUT OF A RELATIONSHIP WITH SKILL. We were loving and kind to each other, I didn’t demonize or tear down the fantastic way we had begun our relationship, I didn’t run off to hook up with someone else.

Then my grief really hit me, I’d lost my best friend, my business partner, and my lover all at once. Even though deep down I knew it was what was next, I was racked with grief. I couldn’t sleep, and I cried every day.

When things are easy, in my control, or when there’s very little pressure on the system, I don’t notice how I’m lying to myself. I don’t see my subtle arrogance. I don’t notice how I am not empowering what I want to create.

But when the stress adds up, when more is asked of me, I notice where I can grow, how I can deepen, and what’s needed of me.

Now is a time to notice what’s missing, what you didn’t account for. It’s not a time to despair or to judge yourself, but to see where your mind struggles to be still in the midst of an always moving world.

So that when the world returns to where it was before, you can create the space to allow for things to fall apart a bit.

Love, Toku

PS If you need help, I’m here. We can talk about your business, your life, whatever. I’m at home more than usual, and I’m happy to serve. Just drop me a comment.