We all have someone we despise just a bit. Coaches that get acclaim but aren’t anything special, internet marketers that sell false promises, politicians that are completely enrolled in a view that from our perspective seems completely distorted.

But what does despising them really help? After all, internet marketers suffer, too.

On some level they woke up with the same fear, heartbreak, and emptiness of purpose that has us doing the work we’d like to paint as completely noble. And they went out looking for a solution. Then, having thought they found the answer to making money, getting attention, being right, they did their best to create that solution. And they succeeded—they succeeded in making their illusion a reality.

But if you met them, spent a day with them, you’d soon see that the illusion offers them only a modicum of comfort. They are simply attached to a ladder up against the wrong wall (like most of us are).

So why get so jealous—so angry—that they’re on the top rung? Instead of worrying about whether our ladder is even up against the right wall?

What if we offered them compassion instead? And stopped seeing our suffering as a sign of failure, but as an opportunity to rededicate ourselves to stepping back into the ambition of helping others—which, after all, is the only ambition that can possibly set us free.