How I Reply To Social Media Posts I Don’t Agree With

Anti-vaccination posts.
Anti-mask posts.
Posts about Bill Gates being a Lizard King
Posts that spread racist or sexist ideas

You see them all the time. You don’t agree with them. But what do you do about them?

This question comes up for me all the time. And each time I’m torn.

On the one hand, I know that allowing misinformation and bigotry to spread unchecked only makes things worse.

On the other hand, EVERY time I respond to one of these posts I get attacked, piled on, dismissed, or even worse I somehow seem to invite more conflict from both sides.

So what do you do?

To be honest, this is why I avoid commenting on posts I disagree with, but when I do I have found one way to offer a different perspective that seems to create the most space for people to connect around their shared values.

Here’s what I do:

1) Talk about your own experience – Instead of telling people they’re dumb or crazy. Simply share your own experience of you’ve grown and changed in your understanding.

For example, this year I bought a gun for target shooting. I believe in gun control and yet when I went to buy my gun I found the process frustrating. It seemed like there were so many loops to jump through and details to manage. But then I remembered that if I was angry or bent on violence all the steps and safeguards may have given me space to really think about my actions, it might have helped me calm down, and decide to not hurt someone I cared about. I get how annoying it is, but I’m glad we have laws that help keep us safe.

Now when I talk to people who are against gun restrictions I can share this experience. Not from a place of ‘guns are bad and you’re a violent nut for liking them,’ but from a place where I truly honor the desire to do something you enjoy and the frustration with laws that seem to get in the way of that.

By sharing your own experiences of how you relate to an issue, you make your opinions about you. You invite people into a story of your life, rather than creating a story about theirs.

2) Honor other people’s feelings – Often when we disagree with someone we discount how they feel. How can they be angry at immigrants? How can they be scared of something that’s been proven safe? How can they feel so reassured by false facts?

But even though they may have come to a different conclusion, their feelings are real.

SO when you talk to people honor their feelings. Express empathy with their desire for freedom, the longing for safety, their sense of unfairness, and then offer a new way to look at the same issue.

“I understand that you get angry at the thought that people who break the law might take jobs from law-abiding citizens, it makes sense, and I learned something the other day about immigrant labor that made me think differently about that.

“I understand that vaccines feel scary and that after hearing some people’s stories you feel cautious. When I hear those stories a part of me feels worried too.”

When you do this, you’re letting them know, ‘ You’re not crazy to feel that way’ and I have a different take on it. When you really hear people, you make it easier for them to hear you.

3) Don’t make other people wrong – Finally, if you can, don’t make the people you’re disagreeing with wrong. We usually do this by saying things like

“people who don’t wear masks are idiots” or “anyone who doesn’t get their kids vaccinated is a bad parent”

If someone is calling you an idiot or a bad parent, you’re not likely to listen to them.

So instead let them be who they are and simply offer an alternative point of view.

“I get that people who don’t wear masks care about their personal freedom, but for me, I realized that in this case, my freedom might hurt someone I love.”

“I can really feel the love anti-vax parents have for their kids. I care about my kids too and I’m scared they might get sick from some of the horrible diseases we have vaccines for. . . “

By understanding and honoring their intentions even if you disagree with their conclusions makes a big difference.

At our core, we all want the same things. We want our friends and family to be safe and happy. And while the strategies we use to get there might be different, the desire is the same.

Learning how to tap into this, is sort of like a magic spell. One that helps us connect with the deep humanity underneath opinions and points of view. If you can learn to come from this place consistently there’s so much that’s possible. ANd it’s this kind of deep compassion that our world needs now more than ever.

 

Day 4: Gratitude

What are you grateful for?

You’ve had a bad day. Your co-workers were combative, your partner was irritable, you spilled coffee on your shirt, and you got stuck in traffic.

In fact it would feel great right now to just have a full on killer bitch session about all the problems in your life. So go ahead! Spend a couple seconds right now thinking of all the things that sucked about today.

Ok, done? How do you feel? Grumpy, irritable, tired, frustrated?

Now let’s flip that around. Starting at the beginning of your day think of all the things for which you are grateful.

It might start with the warm soft bed you sleep in. Maybe it’s not as nice as you would like, but you are inside and it’s better than a dirt floor.

Then you eat breakfast. Here you are with a bounty of food in front of you. So many people worked to bring this food to you. They planted seeds, grew grains, harvested, processed, packed, and trucked the food to a store where you could choose from a ton of different types of food. Amazing.

Then you get in your car or on your bike. Someone invented this. One day no car or bike the next BAM amazing efficient transportation.

As you go throughout your day notice the kindness people show. Notice all of the blessings that make your lifejust a little bit easier than it could be.

Ok now how do you feel? Warmer, calmer, more open?

Gratitude is one of the simplest and most powerful things you can do to create happiness in your life. And this isn’t just conjecture. There’s actual science that backs it up.

In a study performed at the University of California, three groups of participants were asked to do some writing:

  • One group wrote about things they were grateful for.
  • Another group wrote about things that annoyed them.
  • The last group wrote about things that had affected them (with no emphasis on good or bad).

After 10 weeks those who wrote about gratitude reported feeling more optimistic and happy. In addition researchers discovered the following connections:

  • Practicing gratitude is easier than you think. When asked to rate their gratitude on a scale of 1 to 7, participants rated it as a 6.
  • Gratitude improves your well being. Practicing gratitude creates more positive emotions including satisfaction and optimism. Plus it can help you feel fewer negative ones.
  • It won’t turn you into PollyAnna. Being grateful won’t cause you to ignore or avoid the challenges in life.
  • Gratitude improves your attitude towards others. If you’re grateful you will improve your ability to be more empathic, generous, and helpful to others.
  • Gratitude improves your spirituality. The study found that people who practice some form of religion had a greater capacity for gratitude, because they were more likely to feel a stronger sense of community and connection.
  • Gratitude decreases materialism. People who practice gratitude are less likely to value material things or measure their success in terms of material wealth. They were also more likely to share what they had with others.

HAPPINESS CHALLENGE # 4

Ok now that you’ve read the research it’s time to try it out yourself. Here is your challenge for today (if you choose to accept it).

  1. Practice – Sometime today take out your happiness journal or a fresh piece of paper and write down: 3 things you are grateful for And one positive event you experienced today. The 3 things can be new things in your life or they can be things you often rely on. Very often my daily list of 3 things includes my cat, my partner, and sweet sweet coffee. Your positive event can be any good thing that happened to you big or small. I’ve written about great workouts, smiles from strangers, and giving a great talk to a large group.
  2. Reflect – Reflect on how you feel. Did this practice help you feel better about your day and the things in your life? Did you notice anything you were grateful for that surprised you? Did you have a hard time coming up with 3 things to write? Whatever it is, take a moment and become aware of how this practice felt. You can even write a short journal entry, email, or blog post about it
  3. Share – Now it’s time to share what your gratitude and your experience with others. So do one or all of the following.
    • Write a blog post about your experience of gratitude or about someone or something you are grateful for. Don’t forget to include a link or trackback to this post or if that’s too complicated post a link in the comments. BONUS: If you were grateful for a living breathing person, send them a link to your post and tell them that you are grateful for them.
    • Write a social media post about one or all of the things you were grateful for and post it via twitter #30dayhappy and/or via facebook on the 30 Day Happiness Challenge Group Page. BONUS: Again if one of these is a person tag them in your post.
    • Share your gratitude list, your positive event, your experience of the challenge, or any questions that this practice brought up for you in the comments below.

Again great work! I’ve loved seeing all of your posts so far and I’m very grateful for every one of you that has joined me on this challenge.

Be Well,
Toku

 

5 Things You Forgot to Be Grateful For

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Be Grateful

5 Things You Forgot to Be Grateful For

I recently finished my month long focus on gratitude practice. Though I have engaged in many types of gratitude practice in the past I enjoyed this month because it helped be realize how important it is to make gratitude part of my daily life.

Here is what I learned

The 5 Blessing of Gratitude

1. People are a Blessing –

Often For a long time I didn’t realize how important the people in my lives were until I lost them. But by practicing gratitude I’ve learned to appreciate these people while they’re still here.

One way I practiced gratitude last month was to send one email a day thanking someone who I know or have known in my life. And with each letter I realized how lucky I was to have these people in my life.

Of all the people in the world, these people came and blessed me. They taught me lessons and gave me strength. They were exactly the people I needed to grow and transform into who I am today.

This month of gratitude has taught me to stop a minute and appreciate the blessing of their kindness and attention.

2. Time is a blessing –

I often think I have more time than I do. More time to get dressed before I go to work, more time to call an old friend, more time to follow my dreams.

But I’ve discovered I usually end up having less time than I want. And because of this I’ve learned I need to cherish the time I have.

This month I practiced cherishing every day by sharing three good things about my day with someone I love. This practice helped me focus on the blessing each day is and kept me from getting caught in the spin of negative thought.

It’s so easy to get caught up in wishing I was someone else, somewhere else. But I’ve learned that by being grateful for where I am I can enjoy my life as it is right now.

3. Space is a blessing –

Sometimes I’m am afraid of empty space. There are time I can’t bear letting silence hang in conversation. Time I can’t stand waiting in line. And time I abhor a moment without something to do.

But this month of gratitude has taught me to appreciate these precious moments of space. Because space is what makes change possible.

This month I practiced being grateful for space by pausing. I found that when I gave myself a moment to breathe so much was possible.

Space is so simple and pure. And yet space is the fertile ground for new ideas and realizations. Space is the place where new wisdom begins to emerge.

By practicing taking a pause, I found that each of these moments is sacred.

The moments spent waiting for the bus are when a solution emerges to the problem you’ve been mulling over. Those moments when you don’t reach for your phone, can reveal how sad you actually feel. And those moments of shared silence can bring you closer then any words if you let them.

4. What I have is a blessing –

Our whole economy is based on the idea of not being happy with what we’ve got. And I’m not just talking about possessions. I’m talking about our bodies, our knowledge, and our lives.

On one hand we all have to work at being better people. On the other hand better selves and better lives start with appreciating where we are now.

This month I practiced being grateful for what I have by reflecting daily on my blessings. As I did this, I realized how rich and abundant my life truly is.

I found that when I can learn to be grateful for this job, this shirt, this set of knowledge, and this life. I also learn to find greater balance and peace in every step along the way.

5. Gratitude is a blessing.

More than anything I learned over this last month that having gratitude is a blessing in itself. It’s not that I need to live a life that rocks, so I can be grateful. It’s that I need to be grateful, in order to live a life that rocks.

The more grateful I am, the more I see my blessings. The more I appreciate my life, the more kind and open I become.
And the more kind and open I am the more things I discover that help me grow.

Now it’s your turn. What are you grateful for?

PS

I also want to thank all of you for sharing your attention span with me. Your time and attention are your most valuable resource and I’m so honored that you share it with me. I promise to honor that with always giving you the best of my self on this blog.

 

10 Steps to a Grateful Life as Taught by Leo Babauta of Zen Habits

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So Grateful!

10 Steps to A Grateful Life

as Taught by Leo Babauta of Zen Habits

Gratitude

Gratitude has an amazing power to free your mind from turmoil. It helps you feel closer to those you love. And to forgive those that you feel conflict with.

Gratitude can make old possessions seem like new. It can make a bad day feel like a blessing. And it can help us rediscover our own innate beauty and perfection.

Gratitude can do all this because practicing it helps us let go of expectations and embrace the present moment.

I recently had the chance to attend a webinar hosted by Leo Babauta of Zen Habits and his friend Dirk as part of his Sea Change program. During this webinar, Leo talked about why gratitude was so powerful and offered some simple tips for being more grateful.

No Expectations

Leo noted that gratitude is powerful because it helps us let go of our expectations.

Let’s say you have a dear friend, but you have allot of expectations about how that friend should act and respond to you. Sometimes this friend won’t act the way you expect and so you will often be thinking, “This isn’t a good friend.”

Then imagine that you let go of all these expectations. Now instead of being disappointed, you can just enjoy your friend for who they are. Instead of ‘shoulding’, others we can just practice gratitude for where people are at.

No Comparison

In a similar way Leo points out that gratitude can also free us from comparison.

If you compare yourself to others, you can always find someone who seems to be better off. No matter what measure you use there is always someone with more mindfulness, a more beautiful home, and a more satisfying job.

Often this reality can make us feel bad about ourselves. But gratitude relieves us of the expectation that we should be like other people. And it helps us appreciate where we are right now.

Practice

Next Leo offered some simple way to practice gratitude everyday. I’ve also included some of the things I’ve learned about practicing gratitude this month.

1. Be Grateful Morning and Night 

Morning

Every morning write down 3 things you are grateful for. I use Evernote to keep my gratitude journal, but you can use any text program or an old notebook.

I also keep a running tally of my entries and review them after every 50th entry. I find this helps me connect with how abundant my life is and keeps encouraging me to practice gratitude on a daily basis.

Night

Every evening share 3 good things about your day. You can share with your significant other, a child, or a family member. Or you can email them to a friend or post them on Facebook.
I also record one of those events each day in a journal. I find that reflecting on a good event from the previous day, helps me have hope that something good will happen again today.

2. Be Grateful For Food

Before each meal I say a short blessing as a way of expressing gratitude.

But Leo notes we can also express gratitude to the people who cooked our food, or sold us our food, or grew our food. We can express gratitude by eating mindfully. And in turn, mindful eating can make us more grateful.

There is a wonderful exercise called looking deeply into your food that is designed to help you do just this. You can find it here.

3. Be Grateful For People 

Before meeting someone we can express internal gratitude for the meeting.

Then while we are meeting instead of trying to convince the other person that you are right. Or just waiting for your turn to talk. We can simply feel grateful for the interaction

Then at the end of a meeting, we can express gratitude in words and later with a quick note or email. Doing this will not only make us more likeable, but will also help us get the most out of being with others.

4. Be Grateful For Challenging People 

Instead of focusing on someone’s faults we can be grateful for their strengths. If we think someone is too chatty, we can be grateful that they want to connect. If we think someone is pushy, we can be grateful that they value action.

If that doesn’t work, we can still try to empathize before we judge them. We can try to understand where they are coming from and be grateful for their perspective.
Even if we decide to limit interaction with a difficult person, we can find gratitude. We can be grateful for the clarity we have that we don’t want to act like this. We can be grateful for knowing that this person isn’t good for us to be around.

5. Be Grateful For Exercise

Exercise can be challenging especially when we get started. But Leo says we can transform that struggle with gratitude. Instead of complaining about exercise, we can try to be grateful that we can move and be active.

In addition, I often encourage my clients to focus on what they can do, instead of what they can’t. For every athlete we see on TV there are a hundred people who don’t even walk a few times a week. Just setting the intention to get more exercise puts you ahead of the curve.

6. Be Grateful For Meditation

Meditation is a wonderful gift we can give ourselves. Even if your mind seems unruly that we can be grateful that we can sit.

We can also be grateful that we have the time to practice. We can be grateful that we found a meditation. And we can be grateful for our intention to find clarity.

7. Be Grateful At Work

At the beginning and end of your day you can express gratitude that you have a job, when so many other people do not.

Email can be annoying, but instead of opening your inbox with dread. Try expressing gratitude that someone emailed you.

Express gratitude to your co-workers or employees by sending one email a day telling them why they rock.

I try to do this each morning. And even though I don’t have co-workers, I find that sending a nice email to a friend or colleague helps me be more kind throughout my day.

8. Be Grateful While Driving

Whenever you drive you can be grateful you have a car. (Or if you’re like me, you can be grateful that you have a bike instead of a car.)

While you are driving, you can be grateful that you have somewhere to go, someone to meet, and the ability to get there.

When you are in traffic, you can be grateful that you are part of such a vibrant productive society. You might even try saying, “We’re all in this together.”

9. Be Grateful During Hard Times

One of the hardest times to be grateful is when you are going through something difficult. For example is someone you know is ill and/or dying.

Even then, gratitude is a great gift to share. You can be grateful for all the time you have spent with them. You can share that gratitude with them and also express it to yourself.

You can be grateful that you can be with them while they are sick. Being present for someone else in pain is such a blessing.

Other times gratitude is hard because we are suffering ourselves, either from illness or sadness. In either case, you can be grateful for the lessons that this challenge is teaching you.

You can be grateful that others are willing to be there with you. You can be grateful that challenge helps you appreciate the good times more. You can be grateful that you are facing this challenge instead of someone else.

10. Be Grateful By Remembering

One key to being grateful is remembering to practice gratitude. Leo recommends 3 ways to ensure help you remember.

  1. Write down what you want to remember to be grateful for. Paying special attention to things you often take for granted.
  2. Make a commitment to someone else to practice gratitude.
  3. When gratitude is hard, imagine losing the things you care about and then imagine them coming back to you.

Imagine you lost your family, friends, shelter, food, possessions, computer, and/or the Internet. Feel the weight of that loss and then feel the joy as these things return to your life.

Gratitude Meditation

At the end of webinar, Leo offered a simple meditation that you can practice almost anywhere. This meditation will help you focus on gratitude and it can give you the energy to carry this gratitude into the day.
First, find a comfortable spot and check in to your body. If it is safe and it’s your practice to do so, close your eyes. Ask yourself how am I feeling?
Notice the answer and then just appreciate your body. Make sure to express appreciation especially for any part of your body that complaining.
Next, notice your breath. Watch as it comes in and out. Ask what qualities does my breath have.
Notice the answer and then just appreciate these qualities no matter what they are.

Next, silently repeat these phrases in your mind.
May I be happy.
May my loved ones be happy.
May my acquaintances, my colleagues, and my work friends be happy.
May the people who give me agitation and even my enemies be happy.
May the entire world be happy.
Then pause and repeat.

You can repeat this meditation as many time as you want to  and can modify it to fit your needs. If any of the phrases is too hard for you to say just leave them out with one exception. Always begin with the phrase, “May I be happy.” It may seem selfish, but without joy in our hearts, we cannot truly offer joy to others.

 

Eating with Gratitude: A Mindful Eating Thought Experiment (Audio)

Paleo diets are all the rage so lets do a Paleo thought experiment.

Imagine you were a Paleolithic man or woman. It’s been a hard winter and your food supplies have been dwindled. Your young children are hungry, but spring has come late this year. Nothing is sprouting and the game hasn’t returned as it normally does.

The Search
You have been searching for food, but other than a few meager herbs, nothing can be found. You know that if you return home with nothing it will mean another day without eating.

Your youngest has been growing weaker. She’s been coughing and unable to rise from her mat. You know that if you don’t find more food soon she won’t make it.

<

p style=”text-align:Left;”>Feel the fear, the frustration, and the confusion at your situation. Feel the deep hunger in your own belly, which hasn’t been properly fed in weeks. You feel an ache not only for yourself but for your family as well.
Eating with Gratitude: A Mindful Eating Thought Experiment (Audio), eating+, gentoku, gratitude, guided meditation, mindfitmove, mindful eating, mindful fitness, What is mindfulness?

Lost
Now imagine as you return home you become lost. You have never been in this part of the valley before at first, you are scared, but then you come across a tree.

On the tree are strange objects you haven’t seen before. You take one down and it smells sweet. You are unsure what to do, but you figure you have nothing to lose. So, you take a bite. The taste of sugary sweetness fills your mouth.

The rich grainy texture is a little sour, but you can tell this is food. You rush to gather as much of this new fruit as you can, eating as you go.

With your arms full, you head back the direction you came. And with each step, you know you carry hope for your family. Your heart is filled with deep abiding gratitude.

The Salvation of Food
For centuries, food was a blessing. People sacrificed to harvest gods and performed sacred rituals, but for most of us, access to food is an afterthought. Living in a modernized western world our idea of hunger is mostly abstract.

Even hunger that occurs on a diet is very different from the hunger brought on by starvation. Because of this, we have lost our sense of the struggle to eat that our ancestors fought with.

Wars have been fought over the same salt and sugar we buy at the grocery store everyday. But it’s hard to access that reality, because of the relative bounty that we live in.

So for this post I thought I would share a Mindful Eating exercise that helps reconnect us with our gratitude

Eating With Gratitude
[soundcloud url=”http://api.soundcloud.com/tracks/92698148″ params=”” width=” 100%” height=”166″ iframe=”true” /]

Interested in the Paleo vs Veggie debate read this awesome article by Matt from No Meat Athlete – http://www.nomeatathlete.com/vegans-and-paleos/

 

What Made My Heart Explode

WOW!
There are moments  when the universe blows us away. Something clicks and boundless gifts, joy, and hope flow into our lives.

Sometimes blessings come after an accomplishment like:
-winning a race
-hitting our goal weight
– or finishing a long journey

Sometimes they arrive out of the blue like:
-receiving a thoughtful gift
-having a moment of clarity
– or meeting a new friend

No matter what the source, these moments are rich opportunities to practice gratitude. When we take our joy and give it back, it multiplies exponentially.

Young woman enjoying winter

I Believe in Yesterday
Yesterday was a day of joy for me. I had a guest post on TinyBuddha.com, and the number of subscribers I had more than doubled.

I am humbled and honored that so many people are interested in what I have to offer. In this moment, my heart is bursting with gratitude and joy.

I realized that this joy had not come only from my own efforts. I had to share this amazing feeling with those who have supported me. So I set out to do just that and this is what I came up with:

The 5 Steps of Gratitude
Step 1 – Thank Your Mind and Heart
We rely on our hearts and minds to do so much hard work. Yet, these parts rarely receive direct gratitude from us.

The first thing I did was close my eyes and offer gratitude to that which is within me.
As my mind and heart received this thanks I felt them relax in appreciation.

Step 2 – Thank Your Parents
The Buddha said, even if you were to carry you parents around, on your shoulders, for a hundred years plus, you could never repay them for their deep kindness.

So, I sent an e-mail to my folks. I shared my excitement and thanked them for their support. If your relationship with you parents is rocky, you can thank them silently or in a less direct way. The important thing is to acknowledge the energy that brought you into this world.

Step 3 – Thank Your Teachers
Whether it’s a college professor, spiritual guide, or friend who gives you great advice, it’s important to thank your teachers. Great teachers affect us in obvious and subtle ways. They guide us, inspire us, and bless us with wisdom.

I owe so much to my teachers Sensei Hogen Bays and Jan Chozen Bays Roshi. Studying with them opened my eyes to the possibilities of the world and to my own potential. Everything we learn was passed down to us. It’s important to acknowledge the shoulders we stood on to get here.

Step 4 – Thank Your Partner and Friends
No successful person can succeed alone. It takes so much support from others to do anything.

The first phone call I made was to my partner Jane Endacott. She has supported me in so many ways. She reads my blog, edits my posts, and tells me she is proud of me. In addition, she does all sorts of little things to support me.

My friends offer me guidance, hold me accountable, and show me I’m loved and accepted. This week I’m going to make sure to connect and thank each of them.

It doesn’t matter if you’re single or coupled; whether you have one or a hundred friends; it’s important to let them know how much they mean to you.

Step 5 – Thank Your Community
Your community might be a spiritual group, business colleagues, your family, or any other group that supports you.Communities support us by giving us a space to explore ourselves.

I sent out an email of thanks and celebration to Zen Community of Oregon as well as my yoga schoolmates at the Bhaktishop. Without the support of practice and the shared wisdom of these groups, I would be lost.

Bonus Step – Thank Anyone Else
As you start to think about who and what you are grateful for many people may come to mind. Take this chance when your heart is full to say thank you to whomever it is that makes your life possible. 

MindFitMove Practice
Think of a blessing you have received recently, big or small it doesn’t matter.
Make a short list of people, groups, or energies that helped make this blessing possible.
Make a vow to express gratitude to everyone or everything on your list.

What are you thankful for?

 

What Your Back Can Teach You

What Your Back Can Teach You.

BackPain

Photo By RedKoala1

Recently my back went out. It was a result of over use and deciding to sleep on the floor.

It’s been a challenging experience that is still affecting me 2 days later. Even as I type this, I feel woozy as the results of the muscle relaxers I am taking.

My mother encouraged me to look for the lessons in this experience. So here are four things I learned about myself when my back went out.

1.The Human Body is Frail.
My body is mostly reliable. However, whenever it stops working I remember that it is also frail.

I am always amazed how the body can do so many things. But it’s very easy to take this for granted.

It’s important to find a balance between activity and rest; challenge and recuperation; pressure and ease.

If we don’t respect this balance trouble ensues.

2. No Part of the Body is Dispensable
We tend to preference some parts of our body over others. Nevertheless, every piece of your body is important.

Everything in our bodies is integrated. If one part gets hurt, the other parts do more.

Respect every part of your body. You may not realize what you use it for until you can’t use it anymore.

3. Partnership and community –
We all want to think we are self-sufficient. As soon as you become ill or injured, you realize how foolish this is. If it weren’t for my partner and my friends at yoga school, I would’ve been in big trouble.

Developing healthy relationships and community is one of the most important things we can do to support our body and mind.

4. Universal Health Care
Every time I get sick or injured, I am reminded that we need universal health care. No one should ever have to think about the cost of going to get a serious medical condition checked out.

When I broke my arm and hand in a bicycle accident I didn’t go to the hospital for 3 days because I didn’t have good insurance. If you are hurt, you shouldn’t have to think about how insurance effects you. You should just be able to go to the hospital.

We need universal health care in this country. No one should have to delay treatment because they don’t have enough money.

A Learning Moment
Being sick of injured is hard. We realize how helpless we are in the face of impermanence. I didn’t enjoy getting hurt, but I try to get the lesson out of every situation.

Be grateful for health everyday, because you never know when it will be taken away.

MindFitMove Practice
-Reflect on a time you were injured.
-What did it help you realize about yourself and the people you care about?
-What could you do to help someone you know is suffering?
-Don’t wait until you’re sick; offer help to others who need it.
Offer gratitude in advance to those who would care for you if you got sick.

 

Just Be Ordinary

Dedicated to Martin Luther King
an ordinary man who 
changed the world
Just Be Ordinary
 
Our society worships celebrity. It seems wherever we turn we are being told that we must be on TV to be exceptional. In reality, you are actually more interesting, meaningful,  and special than most celebrities. I know, because I’ve met, lived, and worked with them.
Fame
I worked for many years in the music business. I met famous people and even worked with a few ‘celebrities.’
Here’s what I learned about fame:
 
1. Authenticity is rare: Many famous people are very private and isolated. The reason is most people kowtow and kiss up to you. It’s hard to know if someone likes you or just likes your status.
2. Honesty is rare: Not many people will tell you how it is. They want to groom your ego. This may sound great. But people need honestyto develop trust and maintain sanity.
3. Deep satisfaction is rare: Fame is a game of comparison. There is always someone more famous. There is always a bigger tour. Even though they are catered to, very often ‘famous’ people aren’t happy. 
 
Whether or not someone is famous it’s their ability to be ordinary that sets them apart. By far the most amazing people I’ve ever met have been ordinary people first and last.
What does it mean to be ordinary?
 Being ordinary is about being human. Being ordinary is realizing that talent alone doesn’t make greatness. Being ordinary is a vital step on the path of transformation.
Being ordinary doesn’t mean resigning yourself to fate. It doesn’t mean giving up. Being ordinary means relying on your humanity.
What makes people like Mother Teresa, Ghandi, and Martin Luther King amazing is how ordinary they were.
None of them were super human. They were ordinary people who were devoted, passionate, and wouldn’t give up.
Don’t Be Superman
Trying to be super human doesn’t work. Just look at Lance Armstrong, or Barry Bonds. What If they had accepted their lives and their abilities without enhancement?
 Would they would have been amazing figures of sport? Probably. Maybe not as amazing, but they would have achieved great things.
But instead they tried to be something more and ended up being something less.
Being ordinary is about embracing the everyday. It’s about affirming our life, just as it is.

 MindFitMove Practice

Embracing the ordinary is a skill. Here are 3 tips to help you be more exceptionally ordinary today:
 
1. Stop Comparing
We only get into trouble, when we compare ourselves with others. Ordinary life can seem disappointing compared with a semi-scripted television show. But ordinary life isextraordinary.
That’s one problem with comparison. When we compare, we always find ourselves lacking. When we compare we put others on a pedestal.
I would encourage everyone to stop comparing. Only compare if it motivates to go further. Just remember it usually does the opposite.
Run your race. Train the way you need to. Don’t worry about what that other person is doing at the gym. Focus on the work you have to do. Because only you can do it. 
 
2. Practice Satisfaction
 In the U.S. it seems like being dissatisfied is a pass time. We proclaim our preferences loudly and proudly. We complain, we sue, and we act offended.
We don’t have to do this. Instead, we can learn to be satisfied with less. When we learn to be satisfied, we learn to be content.
However, we have to practice satisfaction.
Try being satisfied with the substitute yoga teacher. Try being satisfied without your iPod on a run. Try being satisfied with your performance, even if it isn’t perfect.
3. Express Gratitude
Write down one thing you are grateful for everyday. Sit down with your partner, friend, or family member and tell them  why you are grateful for them in detail.
Say thank you to servers, bus drivers, and most importantly yourself.
Thank yourself for running, for doing your best to eat right, for trying something new, and for transforming your life.
These 3 simple things will change how you look at your life, how you feel about your life, and how you live your life.
Be amazingly ordinary, because it takes many ordinary people to change the world. It takes one ordinary person to transform their life. That ordinary person is you.